An Important UFLDP Update: (1) Lying This Coming Tuesday, (1b) Rookie Table, (2) Major Heineken Restructuring, (3) Jeff Bezos Must Have EVERYTHING?, (4) UFLDP Charitable Foundation Update

 

If you are wondering what happened to your regularly scheduled Liars Dice Championship events, boy do we have excuses reasons. 

 
First and foremost the next UFLDP, sponsored by Heineken®, Liars Dice Championship event is scheduled for this coming Tuesday at 6PM at the legendary Pete Myles Pavilion at Miller's Falls (weather permitting). Please arrive with some sort of food item to share, $5 - $10 in cash, and lowered expectations that you will go home with the UFLDP Cup.

Based upon customer feedback this Tuesday will include a Rookie Table. Apparently the prospect of having to play against some of the UFLDP's most legendary athletes (looking at you Melanie Warr) some prospective new players are hesitant to join the festivities. The winner of the Rookie Table will automatically qualify for the Championship Final Round!!!! SO IF YOU HAVE EVER CONSIDERED PLAYING, THIS TUESDAY AT 6PM YOU NEED TO BE THERE!
 
If you missed the press release, UFLDP sponsor Heineken® has decided to restructure their Carolina sales territory and our current executive, Dylan Knight, has been promoted to the Boston territory (apparently hearty New Englanders drink more Heineken products than Bill Pinciotti (SMDH)). You're obviously thinking "how does this impact me?" as you should. Just know the influx of Heineken family swag is of utmost importance to our sponsor and arrangements are being made.
 
Jeff Bezos. Jeff freaking Bezos. Apparently the world's richest man has to have EVERYTHING? If you look closely you'll see the centerpiece on one of his yachts is none other than the legendary UFLDP Trivia Cup!!!! How he managed to have it purloined from the Overlook Room when no one but Ginger (but let's agree she's relatively useless) spotted the crime is a mystery. Apparently the owners of Hobby Lobby aren't the only oligarchs who collect stolen antiquities. At this point it may be time to get the lawyers involved. 
 
The first half of championship play resulted in a $700 donation to Labor of Love Transport Rescue via Putting for Pets. As previously noted, Salesforce, the exclusive corporate sponsor of the UFLDP Charitable Foundation made a 100% match on top of the $350 raised by UFLDP Championship Athletes.
 
See you Tuesday at 6PM at Miller's Falls!