Just so we are clear, your attendance is required this Saturday evening at Miller's Falls to partake in one of the world's oldest pastimes. NO NOT THAT. (Get your mind out of the gutter.)
Lying & gambling. 
 
Some Important Details
 
1. It is at Miller's Falls. You don't know where Miller's Falls is? Really? 
 
2. I don't know how to play the game. It sounds complicated. 
Really? Have you met your neighbors? I mean, how complicated could it possibly be? And rules are here: https://ufldp.com/How-to-Play/ . But an activity that falls at the intersection of lying, gambling, and some drinking isn't exactly a gathering of Mensa members.
 
3. My children are in town and I don't want to encourage them to lie to me. 
Really? 

And I'm sure that wasn't their beer and they didn't know how it got there.
 
4. I don't really like people. 
Same. But this is an opportunity to lie to them AND possibly take their money. That's a win/win in my book. 
 
So it is agreed. We will see you Saturday at 6. Feel free to bring $5 - $10, although your credit is always good at this Heineken®-sponsored event. You could also bring a light appetizer. Or don't. You know how these things end up with mountains of uneaten food when they are over. 
 
If you can RSVP that'd be helpful. Or don't. Whatever. 
 
From the Office of the UFLDP Commissioner
The UFLDP is Sponsored by Heineken